I have a meeting I haven’t prepared for, a man I am worried about because I might like him more than he does me and laundry to do but I have to do this now!
And then there is that test I have to prepare for. Argh!
Anyways, Please gather around.
I’ll make this short and precise.
So, I have been skinny all my life. Right now, I probably might not be skinny skinny cause i’ve got a few curves and some flesh on my behind but let me tell you, it (clap!) has (clap!) been(clap!) a struggle( double clap!).
Growing up, I was probably a triple zero size. Like really skinny with bones.
The worst part is that I am/was a tall girl which made me stand out in a crowd.
Now, today morning as I listened to a conversation about big sized women versus skinny girls body shaming, i realized that the ‘other’ side knows nothing about ‘this’ side and vice versa.
The general agreement was that women of a larger size face body shaming more than those of us that are skinny. I partly agree.
I also agree that body shaming is body shaming. The effect of body shaming cuts across all body types.
This is what I think though from my experience as a really skinny girl:
FEELING GUILTY ABOUT FEELING BAD ABOUT BEING BODY SHAMED.
Perhaps this is the reason why not so many skinny women talk about it openly. The plus size women make us feel like it is wrong of us to feel the way we feel after being body shamed.
My sister makes fun of my small body size. She casually says stuff like, “how can something so tiny fit into a human being.” In regards to my trousers.
My friends sometimes say that when I give birth I should let them breast feed my baby because I have small teets and the child will obviously be suffering.
Those are mean and sometimes hurtful things to say to someone yet I am not allowed to feel bad. Why? because plus size women have it worse ( they are the ones that shame us by the way) and we have no right to feel bad.
BODY SHAMING AT THE GYM
I have been an athlete all my life yet I would tell you that it is easier for plus size women to be accepted in the gyms than skinnier ones. The first time I went to the gym, a guy openly clicked at me for being there. He loudly asked why I was there.
The people around me complain about me going to the gym yet I am skinny a lot. It is my money that pays for the subscription, myself that commits to the act and my discipline that helps me eat the right food yet I am not ‘supposed’ to be in the gym because I have no fat to lose.
I stopped posting my workouts on social media when I was a little skinnier because the judgement was too much.
It is more acceptable for us to do Yoga and not other forms.
EAT A BURGER!
Friend, I eat more than you do! I eat double your food ffs!
If my eating habits was something to go by, I would be an elephant in size rn. So quit telling us to eat more cause we are doing it. The results are what is lacking.
I once had several workout magazines that talked about how to gain weight in a quick healthy way and when a sibling of mine found it and made a joke to the rest of my family, I had to discard them.
I felt so ashamed for wanting to get more fleshy.
My eight year old niece has struggled with the same too. One day I found her stuffing food into her mouth and when I asked her why, she said she wanted to stop being so skinny.
At eight years old! And you want to tell me that skinny women don’t get ‘skinny-shamed’?
HATING YOUR BODY PARTS
This is for all women and humans I think.
The point I am trying to drive here is that, as a skinny woman, you feel like you need more flesh.
Personally, I hated my knees for like being sharp and shit.
I wanted my breasts to be a little bigger and my butt to have even some layer of flesh.
It takes a while to accept yourself after you grow up. Luckily for me, I started weight lifting and I built a few muscles to cover my flesh. It doesn’t mean that I accept my body more now, but its a positive stride towards that direction.
The worst part is that I hate it when I have a lower stomach buldge because I am skinny and skinny people have flat tummies!
Nowadays, I find it easier to shop for clothes but before, I never got the right size of my clothes.
My parents bought me clothes that were either too buggy that they hang from my sides like a skeleton or too tiny and I couldn’t wear them because I looked like a needle.
I wore bigger size clothes because they made me look more acceptable.
I have seen my bigger siblings struggle with this too despite being big sized women so it is a struggle for those of us that fall in the extreme sides of body types.
What I am trying to say is that it affects us too.
It affects our self-esteem and mental health a lot.
I remember the first time a boy called me pretty in University I laughed it all. I was just like ” men lie a lot!” I couldn’t believe that I was beautiful because being shamed for being skinny made me feel that way.
Let us just stop making this a one-sided conversation.
I must add that Plus size women are more shamed than skinny ones especially when you are not skinny skinny.
Anyways, I have to go because remember the things I said I have to do? It’s about time I focused on them
Let me just drop a link. Go listen to the conversation and join me in the comment section as we discuss body shaming especially for smaller women.