“We aren’t committed, don’t get attached”

Click for Taz, 2021

It has been months since I wrote anything on this blog. I must say that I intended to keep writing but I was tired of always writing about my sadness and depression. I chose to stay away from writing until I found something positive to write about. Well. here I come.

I haven’t been the happiest in the past few months and neither have I been the saddest. I have had good days and bad days alike. There are moments I have totally forgotten about my depression, and there are days where I thought I was pretending to be sad again.

I have googled the definition of happiness severally. One person describes it as a peace of calm and contentment. I have been peaceful, calm, and content but I refuse to call it happiness. Maybe it’s because despite the peace and calm, I still don’t laugh often. Wait, I actually do.

For months I quit social media and stayed exclusively active on You Tube alone where I was really obsessed with travel, food, and a girl that came out of mental depression. Once in a while I come to this platform as it took me through the darkest of my days. I read a few articles and draft mine then leave.  I can’t say that I am proud of my silence about my mental health but it has saved me a lot on my end.

I believe that I am doing better. No, I still haven’t yet called the therapist. Her number lies in my phone untouched. I have been working out lately, started a new skincare routine, taking lots of walks, I found a hustle, I have a pet named paw, and I became a minimalist. Ok, I lied on the last part but hey, it’s a journey and I am doing pretty okay so far.

I just popped in to say that maybe its gets better or weirder. I can’t tell for sure. But I hope you are all doing okay. At least, I am not feeling suicidal anymore. I will make an effort to write frequently as time allows.

Published by La Protagoniste

I hope to find my healing by writing. one story at a time!

2 thoughts on “OH, I’M BACK!

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